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Wednesday, May 14, 2014

Tiber River Cafe--My Faith Story, Part 2


Hello, and welcome to the Tiber River Café.  My name is Dean Humphreys, and today’s topic is the second part of my faith journey story.  In the first part I briefly reviewed my upbringing in the Protestant church, the United Church of Christ, and through my college years and early adulthood of my early 20s.  My early faith journey was mostly non-existent, stagnant, and perhaps lukewarm at best, but looking back I can see hints and nudges to seek more, to open my eyes and ears. 

So I’m now in my early 20s, my first job out of college and living away from home.  I felt called to the married life and wanted a life partner, someone to love and someone to love me.  I knew I wanted to be married and to have a family, and so I set out to find the love of my life.  I wanted to meet someone that would make me a better person, someone with honesty, dignity and sincerity.  And I thought I would meet such a person at one of the local churches.  So I scanned through the Yellow Pages and picked a church that was close, that had a nice name, and the local Presbyterian Church sounded right, so I decided to attend their upcoming Sunday service.  Why Presbyterian?  I enjoyed researching my family history and knew that my ancestors had once attended the local Welsh Presbyterian Church in my home town, so Presbyterian seemed like a good starting point.  I knew absolutely nothing about Presbyterian beliefs or doctrines, I was simply looking to return to my ancestral roots.  So at my first time at the local Presbyterian Church I quickly realized that there were no young women in sight and my time in the Presbyterian Church came to a sudden end. 

But several months later I was introduced to a girl, Lisa, who was the maid-of-honor at my co-worker’s wedding.  We went out on a date which I thought went very well, dinner and a movie, only to find out later she wasn’t interested but agreed to a second date only at the prompting of her mother (and we’ve now been married for over 20 years!).  Around the time that we started dating I decided that I did not want to spend the rest of my life wearing a business suit and carrying a briefcase so I started to explore other career options.  Then one afternoon I was in my apartment by myself and clear as day I heard the words “Be a nurse.”  I will never forget that day, the words were so clear, like someone was standing next to me.  Looking back I can see that God was calling me to my vocation.  The message was very clear, but I knew absolutely nothing about nursing so I started researching about the profession and liked what I was reading, the occupation seemed to fit my personality.  I applied and was accepted to the local nursing school which was affiliated with our local Catholic hospital, and I quit my corporate job—absolutely no regrets and I haven’t worn a suit since.  Becoming a nurse has been one of the best decisions of my life.  I have one of those jobs that I would continue to do for free. 

So as Lisa and I were talking one day the conversation turned towards religion.  She was from a Catholic family who attended Mass every Sunday.  I remember the moment of silence when I told my parents that I was dating a Catholic girl.  I never had a negative perception of the Catholic Church.  I really didn’t know anything about the Catholic Church.  The few people I knew who were Catholic seemed to be very kind and friendly people.  The few times I was inside a Catholic Church were positive experiences; I really do like stained glass windows and Gothic architecture.  But I knew I believed in God and that was the starting point.  The topic of religion can be a game-changer moment for some couples, but we continued to date and our relationship strengthened.  Eventually we started talking about future plans and what-ifs.  And eventually the topic about religion came up again.  If I ever got married (like there was any choice at this point) I definitely knew I would want to raise our family under one faith.  And since I obviously wasn’t staunchly Protestant I would, with a big gulp, convert to the Catholic faith. 

We had already been attending her parish for the past several months. Interesting, I remember thinking at the time that the church of my youth seemed more ‘Catholic’ than the Catholic Church we were attending.  My former Protestant church (St. John’s), well over a hundred years old, had two stories of very large stained glass windows on both sides of the sanctuary, rows of wooden pews with hymnals, a large picture of Jesus, and a massive organ behind the altar area where the choir stood.  The Catholic Church Lisa and I attended (ironically, also St. John’s) had chairs with no kneelers (we visited about a year ago and they have since added them), no statues, a piano but no choir and hardly anyone sang, and no stained glass windows.  Did I mention that I love stained glass windows?  I proposed to Lisa at the end of summer and she thankfully said yes. 

I soon entered the parish RCIA program that autumn and was on my journey to the Catholic Church.  I remember the moment of silence when I told my parents that I was converting to the Catholic Church.  Thankfully it was nothing more than a very brief moment.  I enjoyed the weekly RCIA classes taught by Deacon Bud, they were very informative, welcoming, and friendly.  The book we read in RCIA helped to clarify the basic teachings of the Catholic Church.  I remember the uneasiness I felt the first time I made the sign of the cross or knelt during prayers, because that is what Catholics do—until I reminded myself that I was becoming one of those Catholics.  Lisa and I attended a day-long retreat at Deacon Bud’s home which was eye-opening and powerful.  I remember vividly my Confirmation Mass; it was a beautiful spring day in 1992 at the Easter Vigil.  Walking into the Church Deacon Bud asked me what I had chosen as my Confirmation name.  I asked ‘what is a Confirmation name?’  I really didn’t know of any saints, this was all still pretty new to me, and since it was close to St. Patrick’s Day I chose Patrick as my Confirmation name.  My parents and family were present for the Mass which was very meaningful and encouraging for me.  My parents have always been supportive of my decisions regarding my faith journey. 
Well, there’s the second part of my faith story.  Thanks again for stopping by the Tiber River Café, where there is always plenty of room at the banquet table.  I hope to see you next time.  Peace be with you

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